Thursday, August 19, 2010

Ah Family

So - as I was warned and am personally noticing - families get a little crazy when a new baby is on the way. Especially when said baby is the first grandbaby for either side. It sure makes life interesting.

For instance....

So, we live here in the southwest. And about 98% of our family (both sides) still reside in the Pacific Northwest. All over, the Pacific Northwest, but pretty much within about 7 hours of each other all around. Now - my family have expressed interest in visiting after Random Jr. is born...and we're good with this. We've asked they wait until after mid-September so that we know we'll get the first week to figure out stuff ourselves, but after that, all family are welcome to visit to meet the baby. So far....just my family are taking us up on this. Others don't have the time/money/it's too hot. That's fine. (well, the first 2...the last one is a bit lame, but alrighty)

So, in light of this, we've been saving every month so that we can afford to fly up for about 10 days around Thanksgiving. Have I mentioned yet that money is going to be very tight these next 5 months? Because it is. I'm not working. (thank you dept.) And,'s do-able, but it'll be tight. Yet, we're scrimping and saving so that we can fly up. Honestly, I think this is pretty damn nice of not only spend OUR money, but also to attempt flying with a 2 month old, so that THEY can meet said 2 month old.

And don't get me wrong, everyone's expressing excitement. But...the's already beginning. Sigh.

Let's introduce the players...I have a large family. They live in one part of the state. Mr. Random has a large collection of extended family and his mother about 3 hours north of this. His father lives about 5 hours away, across mountains. The rest of my extended family about 2 hours further than that, also across the mountains. And...we thought we'd go at Thanksgiving, because Mr. Random gets that Thursday and Friday off, meaning we need fewer vacation days to stay longer.

Now, in discussing ideas for the trip...not plans, we're no where near plans yet, with my mother...I brought up the idea of trying to get both sides of the family in one location for a big bang out Thanksgiving. Plus, it would make it easier on us, so we don't end up driving all across the state, spending 2 days here there and everywhere so everyone can meet Random Junior. I thought this seemed reasonable...I mean, we're spending hard-saved cash to fly up...they only have to drive several hours depending on where we do this - everyone wins!

Well...not quite. Mr. Random's dad doesn't do Thanksgiving...and well, it'd be awkward for his mom and dad to be at the same event anyway. They were fine with each other at our wedding...but, it's just not going to happen. Okay, so we do Thanksgiving with his mom and extendeds, my family and extendeds...then go for a few days to Papa Random's...see our friends that also live in that area. Call it a good trip!

Well...not so fast. See, where would we have this big shindig? My parents house is kind of small, and definitely doesn't have the room for anyone to stay the'll be tight fitting us in with the baby. It seems unfair to me to make all of Mr. Random's family get hotel rooms...when we could do the shindig at his mom's overly large house, that has quite a bit of room for my family to stay, and all his extendeds live nearby, and wouldn't need the room OR a hotel. Makes sense right?

Well, my parents aren't overly keen on the idea. (I think it's because they're homebodies and it puts them out of their comfort zone) Immediately, they start going on about the weather and how it's likely to snow and we won't be able to do our plans. Uh huh. MAY snow. Sure. But we're supposed to what? Not plan on seeing anyone just in case? Should we come next spring then? And if the alternative is we're driving all around the state to see everyone individually...well how's that help the snow situation?

Then I find out my extendeds INSIST on having Thanksgiving at home. Which is fine, it'd be a 7 hour drive for them.

Meanwhile, we floated the idea past Mr. Random's mom of having a big shindig at her house to see if she was open to it. Not only is she open to it, she now has her heart set on it. So we've got Mama Random's heart set on having nearly everyone to her house for a big Thanksgiving dinner. My parents predicting doom and gloom for driving conditions. My extendeds insisting on not coming...and everyone still "so excited" to see us when we come visit.

Ah yes. Meanwhile, the more we have to drive around to see everyone, the more this trip will cost us - as we'll be putting a lot of gas into a rental car. Sigh.

The kid's not even born yet, but it's already begun.

These dramas are part of the reason Mr. Random likes living 1,000 miles away. And doesn't want to move back too close. And yet, in some ways, if we lived closer (close enough to drive, not fly let's say) it seems like it might be less drama. Plus, then we might be able to break it up and see family in different parts of the state in a few separate trips. Instead of trying to do a grand tour.

Anyway, I am still looking forward to the trip. It'll likely be exhausting and mildly stressful. But I think it'll be fun too.


  1. 1. My son was born in September (2008) and we flew to visit my husband's extended family that Thanksgiving. I was really nervous, but flying with a 2-month-old was actually surprisingly easy. You know how white noise calms newborns? Jet engines are *fantastic*!

    2. Everyone is complaining and hemming and hawing right now because they know that you're still deciding. We had that same issue with my MIL that first Thanksgiving. We finally talked to everyone involved: "Thanks for your input! I know it's a tough time of year, but we're so excited for you to meet our new addition! Here's where we're planning to be for each of the 10 days ....! I know you'll understand that we can't do too much driving around with a newborn. We're looking forward to seeing you in X place on Y days. Can't wait!" Once it's all laid out, they'll get on board.

  2. Hmmm...I like how you phrased that for basically telling family how it's going to be, in a nice way. :) Thanks!


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I have a journal. You know, the real kind...paper, bound in a book form...nice leather cover. And I do write in it...every few months. I like it, but somehow I find it hard to keep up regularly. I'm at a computer nearly all the time, so I find it easier to keep up on this blog. So, that's what this blog is for. To help me journal when I'm away from my journal. A place to collect my thoughts before I lose them to the chaos of my mind.

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